Healing is messy. It’s nonlinear and full of moments where you feel like you’re back at square one—reverting to old habits, falling into familiar patterns, or questioning if progress is even possible.

Through it all, three mindsets emerged as my guiding stars, helping me navigate the chaos and continue growing—even when the path felt impossible. They weren’t apparent until much later, after many tears and resistance to change:

1. Acceptance

Acceptance is recognizing and allowing reality as it is—without resistance, denial, or judgment. It’s an inner acknowledgment: “This is what’s happening.”

2. Surrender

Surrender goes a step further. It’s not only accepting reality but also releasing the need to control or fight against it. Surrender carries a sense of trust—in life, in the process, or in something greater than yourself.

3. Curiosity

Curiosity is the bridge that softens the edges of both acceptance and surrender.

Let’s dig a little deeper into how curiosity helps us lean into the unknown with openness, rather than dread and fear.

Curiosity in Acceptance

Acceptance can sometimes feel heavy—like “I just have to put up with this.” But when you bring curiosity in, it shifts from resignation to gentle exploration. Instead of “This is just how it is,” curiosity asks:

• “What am I feeling in my body right now?”
• “What is this emotion trying to show me?”
• “Can I notice this moment without judgment?”

Curiosity opens the door for acceptance to feel active, compassionate, and alive, rather than passive.

Curiosity in Surrender

Surrender can feel scary because it asks us to let go of control. Curiosity transforms fear into wonder:

• “What might unfold if I release my grip here?”
• “What new possibilities could arise if I stop forcing an outcome?”
• “How might life surprise me if I trust it?”

They balance each other too — acceptance without curiosity can feel flat, surrender without acceptance can feel like avoidance, and curiosity without grounding can feel like being unanchored. But practiced together, they create a spacious, compassionate way of meeting life.

Becoming the Observer

When I began questioning everything with curiosity, I stepped into the role of an observer. I realized my story no longer defined me—I could become the author. I was no longer the girl abandoned by her mother or abused and neglected by her father. I could be whomever I wanted to be and I became limitless instead of limited.

Some questions I began asking myself daily:

• Where did this emotion come from? Am I triggered because of an unhealed wound or am I justified in my reaction?
• Why did I laugh it off instead of standing up for myself?
• What was I avoiding? Why do I care more about their feelings than my own discomfort?

Curiosity is the first, most powerful step. Instead of reacting or exploding, step back, check in with your body, notice the emotions, and ask: What am I avoiding and why?

Once you start asking the tough questions, acceptance and surrender naturally follow—and transformation begins.

Call to Action

If you’re ready to step into curiosity, acceptance, and surrender in your own life, start small today:

• Notice one emotion without judgment.
• Ask yourself where it’s coming from.
• Take one action that honors your needs instead of reacting automatically.

💛 I’d love to hear from you: What’s one area of your life where curiosity could shift your perspective? Comment below, share your story, or journal it for yourself.

Stay tuned for my next post, where I dive deeper into practical tools for leaning into curiosity and using it to transform your inner world.

Much love,

Beth Reid